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Ego, Id and I

by Raja Ghraizi

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1.
Lingering 03:01
Take a look all around you. Everything fits in its place, Except the air that you’re breathing, Feels like a waste. Take a look in the mirror, See the wrinkles on your face, Bet you didn’t see it coming, At such a pace. And if you had the choice, I’m sure you’d do it all again. Buy a house in the suburb Fill it up with fancy things, Tell our friends to come over, And we can eat and drink, And dance and sing. And fill our lives with lies, I should have tried to look them in the eyes. There’s a lingering sorrow, Deep inside my soul, Goes through me like a bullet, And leaves a hole, And I don’t know when it comes, But I’d sure would love to find out when it goes.
2.
When my heart is in tune with the world, This big love that speaks so loud but cant be heard. Ain’t it sad to be silenced by the rest, Ain’t it sad to be silenced by detest When my thoughts are at odds with themselves, A civil war behind the walls inside my head, Ain’t it hard to always have to justify, Everything between the Ego, Id and I.
3.
Don’t you try to play with the boys in the street, Don’t you know they just want somebody to beat, Play high or play low, Just don’t let your feelings show, Keep them hidden like, The lover by your side, And don’t you go out trying to find someone to meet. Don’t you go where you’ve never been before, Don’t you know its only gonna get you to the floor, With your legs all broken or you’re paralyzed, All worn out with tears in your eyes. Play high or play low, Just don’t let your feelings show, Keep them hidden like, The lover by your side. And don’t you go out trying to find someone to meet. Don’t let other people tell you what to do, You have seen enough to see it through, Whether high or low, Just let your feelings go, Keep them satisfied, The lover by your side.
4.
Quiver 02:21
Lately life’s been hard on me, But mostly I’ve been hard on myself. The enemies that I’ve kept at sea, Are now all marching in with stealth. And my defence is low, My defence is low, My defence is low and I know, I can’t hold them back no more. My nerves collapse into a quiver, Keep a straight face while I shiver. See you see the black holes in my eyes. Behind the eyes there’s no disguise. And my pretence is gone, My pretence is gone, My pretence is gone and I can’t Hide behind it no more. I’m afraid of all my thoughts, And I’m afraid of all of yours too. All this fear came suddenly, And like a storm it ripped me into two. And now it’s here to stay. Now it’s here to stay. Now its here to stay but I hope I’ll drown it someday.
5.
Grudge 03:33
It’s better not to hold a grudge, It’s even better not to let it get a grip on you. Grudges only bring you down, And they’ll leave you feeling blue. It’s better not to hold a grudge, It happened way too long ago. You don’t have to talk so loud, I can hear you very well. Talking always brings me down. Just one look at me and you could tell. You don’t have to talk so loud, It only widens up the gap. Hmmmm … Hmmm …. Hmmmmmm …. X 3 Safe within and safe without, That’s what everybody wants. Safety only ties you down, And it nails you to the ground. Safe within and safe without, You’ll end up living in a box. Hmmm …. Hmmmm … Hmmm…. X 5
6.
Sometimes 03:09
Sometimes, I get up And sometimes baby, I get down. But its got nothing to do, With the way I feel about you. Days are what they seem, One step closer, To misery. It’s got nothing to do with the way you see The world. I’ll take a walk outside, And try to find, My way back home. Time flies in a plane, One odd moment put in a frame, Its got something to do, With the wheres or whys. We’ll take another shot, And try our best To pause, The world.
7.
Mexico 02:32
I’ve met a lot of people, But I forgot all of their names, While I was too busy fishing, Deep inside my brains, For all the, Love gone down the drain I’ve met a lot of souls, On the coast of Mexico, Though I’ve never been there, But who are they to know, Just where I’ve been, And where it is I’ll go. It’s a shame, How we change, Upside down, Yet still remain, In our place, All the same, Take the time, And rearrange yourself for me. Why bother about tomorrow, When we’re barely here today, All the things that we have been through, They’re out of the way, So get in line, And let me hear you say. It’s no shame, How we change, Upside down, And still remain, In our place, All the same, But in time, I might give my fears away.
8.
All Love 03:31
I’m moving backwards, With every step I take, But its okay, Its okay. Always uncertain, Of everything I do, Except when I’m doing, Something with you, Cuz you have got a lot of love, To give. Breathe it in and spread it out, We’ll live.
9.
Aching Ears 00:57
My ears are aching from listening to the words you choose to speak Your face is breaking and exposing all that's hidden underneath
10.
Train 02:47
It’s been a long long time. I wear these shoes of mine. It’s hard to say, If I’m on my way, Or its on me. Don’t you lose your faith, Fill your heart with grace, Your day will come, You’ll shine as bright as the burning sun. It’s all worth the while, It’s all worth the while. Freedom has a price, It comes as a surprise, The world spins round, Head meets ground and what an awful sound. I’ve just been hit by a train. I’ve just been hit by a train. I’ve just been hit by a train. I’ve just been hit by a train.
11.
Home 02:42
There’s no place like home, No rules set in stone. It’s all in your mind, It’s all written in the books, Yet our eyes still try to find the holes in the walls. Strangers we stay, To our own crooked ways. Of leading our lives, Our own day to day. And it’s hard to find the right things, to do and to say.

credits

released September 23, 2020

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Raja Ghraizi Hamburg, Germany

Raja Ghraizi’s debut album - Ego, id and I - is in many ways an autobiographical work, exploring the ins and outs of a person well blessed, and cursed with diversity and randomness. Raja was born in Lagos, Nigeria to Lebanese parents and spent many years alternating between Lebanon and Nigeria, two countries abundant with culture, stimulus and mystical magic.

Recorded in North Germany in 12/2019
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